Deodorant, Dinosaurs and Doctors, oh my!

What, you ask, the heck do those three things have to do with each other? Nothing really. Well, except the dino and the deodorant. Confused? I was too.

I was taking a shower and Kian was playing in the bathroom (any other mother notice that the word 'play' should really be changed to 'getting into things and making messes'? good) and he told me his triceratops needed to be rinsed off. I asked why and he told me it was full of soap. I'm wondering where he got soap from. Peeking out, he shows me the dinosaur-covered in white stuff-and in his hand is my deodorant. Yep, took it off the counter and smooshed it all over the dinosaur. Lovely...because that doesn't come off easy. Whatever. It's still sitting in the tub, it can wait. Also, he took my deodorant and drew a few letters on the bathroom carpet with it...sigh.

After the shower we made our way to the preschool tour and the theme there was....ta da! Dinosaurs! I told Kian we were going to look at a preschool and he fought me, saying he didn't want to go to school, he didn't want to look, he wanted to stay home. I told him we were just going to look and see if he liked it. We finally pulled in the parking lot and he says "I like it!". Upon entering, he was all smiles, and when he saw all the dinosaurs (legos, in the sand table, posters, craft) he couldn't contain himself. We looked around for a half hour or so while he played and then I told him we were done. He didn't want to leave of course. I had to do the countdown warning (3 mins, 1 min) and get him out of there with a sticker from the director so there wasn't a meltdown. I told him he might be able to come back soon (they have openings now for 2 days/week! yay!) and that we just came to look today. He continues playing and says "I'm still looking!". haha.

The doctor has nothing to do with either of these things...well there were dinosaurs at the doctor's office, perhaps that is the segue I needed? But, I just needed to throw our update in there. Wednesday I took Karter to see Dr. Weinberg, an integrative pediatrician. Meaning she's a fully trained pediatrician by mainstream medical standards abut also trained in natural therapies, nutrition, supplementation, etc. It was nice to just be able to sit down and start from the beginning with Karter's issues, from in utero when we found out about his concerns on ultrasound all the way until today. I get to tell doctors and people in pieces here and there, so to have it completely from start to present, and get everything in there, and have someone just listen, was nice.

We discussed his allergy testing and possible sensitivities, reflux and medicines, sleep habits and issues, everything really. She commended me for the things I had been doing--adding papaya enzymes, using foods to try to boost his calorie intake with olive oil, using avocado, etc. And some things I had in my head but to hear them, and ordered in some sort of plan. She's ordering a few more blood tests and wants to check for vitamin deficiencies. We're also going to do a comprehensive stool analysis, to look at anything and everything that might "come out" from there...sure, pun intended ;)

So, our new course of action is:
1. Do a strict dairy(milk) and egg free diet for 3 weeks to see if it makes a difference with his eating and/or sleeping. The thought being that he is showing some allergies but sensitivities in the gut don't show up on tests. If no changes, then we can think about adding in some organic whole milk because--

2. He's lacking in fats, and some proteins in his diet. Not for lack of trying. I let this kid eat whatever he wants-pizza, sausage, hot dogs, etc. But, my kids love fruits and veggies. While this doesn't help his current weight status, it will definitely help his long-term health. So, we need to boost fats and proteins more. I shovel this kid with PB all day long, but adding more oils, margarine, meats if he will, and a different milk source.

3. She suggested Hemp milk. I know what you're thinking. No, he won't get high from it ;) But, compared to rice or almond milk, it has a higher protein content and full of omega-3 & 6. The other 3 have only 1 grams per serving. So, we'll try that.

4. Continue working on the behavioral part of sleeping through the night. I've been successful in getting Karter to go about 8-10 hours without wanting to eat/nurse/drink since beginning this process again on Monday. I just keep telling him he has to wait until morning. He still wakes a few times, but usually snuggling in with us keeps him happy until 6 or 7am. I'd love for him to be sleeping all night but, I'll take what I can get right now.

5. The other thing she suggested was for me to change the time I give him the Prevacid. I was giving it first thing in the morning, but she suggested I try giving it to him before bed. This way, if there is reflux it will curb it all night, and not "run out" by bedtime/overnight and have him wake up more. But, ultimately, we want him off it, sooner than later.

6. A few more blood tests for vitamin deficiencies and a few other things, just in case. Also, a comprehensive stool analysis to see if there are any malabsorption issues, what's being digested, what's not, and a host of other things. That will be fun collecting...no, really!

And whatever else I forgot she will be sending in a report to me and the regular pediatrician. Monday we have the 18 month check up, so will be interesting to see how much he's gained, since he's been on the Prevacid for almost 2 months now... And that is a random recap...

Tricks and tweaks for Karter

As I'm beginning to type this, I am waiting for the doctor's office to return my call about the gastric emptying test Karter had last Friday. There are a few things we've been trying out and trying to get done or get over in the last few weeks: more solid sleep at night (maybe less during the day), improved eating, removing eggs, etc. Some days it seems to work, other days, not.

Sleeping through the night: I admit, I really just would like to sleep more than 3-4 hours in a row. Like, 6 would be nice. And it's not like he even wakes up quietly or nicely, which I could deal with better, I think. He wakes up and yells. If he's in our bed, he kicks and rolls around and has a particular side and way he wants to lay next to me and gets mad if I move. Can't win. And no, we can't cry it out--he shares a room with Kian, and I don't want to, and he's not the kind of kid who would even do that--okay sure if I wanted to let him scream for 12 hours straight. Anyways, we were hitting some longer stretches and no eating during the night and I was feeling like we were on a good path, but there's always snags. Of course, I started watching a couple kids for a couple weeks so, I changed his routine again. He's sensitive to that sort of thing. But, amazingly flexible about other things.

Removing eggs: We got the allergy test results few weeks before Christmas and it surprised us with the allergy to eggs. The doctor told us the results were "mild-moderate" and that straight eggs would probably be best to stay away from, but in baked goods would probably be fine. Just before Christmas I had also introduced some organic whole milk as it seemed dairy issues were diminishing. But, of course, why would we not get a stomach bug the week before the holiday? We all got over it in a day or 2, but Karter's diarrhea lasted for just over 2 weeks. Ugh. Kevin finally said to me "Stop. Just stop. Stop the milk. Stop the eggs. Don't give him the things we think might be bothering him." So, I did. No eggs, no mayo, no eggs in other foods, no milk, no yogurt, nothing. And, lo and behold, the diarrhea stopped within 2 days. AND, to top it off, since stopping the eggs, it's been a week and a half, Karter's appetite has improved immensely! He's been eating like crazy, not a huge first-thing-in-the-morning eater, but asks to eat all day long. I give him what he wants and them some. It's a huge struggle but I've been able to turn down more fruit and give him -sigh-potato chips haha.

Another thing with the weight, is that, Kevin's side is thin. His father's side is very tall and thin. Kevin has a high metabolism and has a hard time keeping weight on. Also, it's what we eat. We don't do processed foods hardly. Lunches are lean meats, veggies and fruits. Sometimes it's just hummus and veggies and pita chips (hummus being beans) or guacamole with tortillas and more veggies. We do pizza like once a week, or eat out maybe once a week, but even then, it's not overly fried, fatty foods. We're just healthy eaters, and the foods Karter loves (bananas, apples, beans, etc.) aren't foods that are going to put weight on him, except the peanut butter.

Okay, doctor just called back. Karter's emptying was slightly delayed. Not a lot he said, but it showed up a little. I don't remember the numbers. Also, he did show some reflux. Now, to be fair I gave him yogurt for the test. Perhaps it was the dairy, perhaps it's the reflux. Perhaps, it's both. We agreed to try the reflux meds again and when we meet for his 18 month check up in March we'll assess how it's going. I think this, combined with the egg free and minimal dairy diet, will really help. Well, I'm hoping it will really help. This guy needs some weight on him and to get taller. So, that is that for this week...we'll see what happens once he's back on the reflux meds.

quick update from the snow-blasted state

I can't say I miss all the lake effect snow up in Rochester. While they were getting pummeled with it the last few days we haven't had half as much...plus it has been so windy it just blows away into a drift on the one side of the yard. I had to drive up through it all, one particularly bad spot near East Rochester/Pittsford exits of 490, were so snowy I couldn't see well and the roads were terribly covered. One lady spun out a few cars in front of me and ended up smashing her back end into the guard rail. But after that, it was fine.

I ventured up on this snowy, freezing, crummy day for Karter's 15 month check. Uhhh. Got there with time to spare, even though it was slow going. But the usually timely doctor was late getting in our room. It is very hard to entertain a 1 and 3 year old in a 10x10 room for very long, with only 2 toys and 3 books. Yeah. And because he was now running behind, I don't feel I got to talk and discuss as much as I would have liked to, or usually get to.

The stats: Head size-26th perentile, fine. Height: 30.25 inches-25th percentile, fine. Weight: sigh. 19lbs. Not even near the chart. Like, more than 5% under it.

So we discussed my concerns--not eating much, sleeping too much during the day, not sleeping at night well, how it's related to food, possible reflux, my thoughts about delayed gastric emptying (something I've wondered about since he started solids, which is when all these problems surfaced) blood work, tests, etc.

We decided to do some more food allergy testing (blood tests) for egg, corn, soy, wheat (since Kevin is also being tested for Celiac's after his hospital stint and colonoscopy and tummy troubles, probably not it, but you never know). Problem is he might not be allergic to foods, but just intolerant or sensitive, which will not show up on tests. Ugh. And that might mean he can have small amounts but not large amounts, etc. Also in that blood tests, which they took 5, yep that's right, 5! vials will be: thyroid, celiac's, iron, general inflammation in his body, general blood counts, other allergy flags, etc.

He asked if we wanted to try prevacid again for the reflux but I said I'd like to know if that's really what we're dealing with or something else in his digestive system. So we're doing a Scinta scan (spelling?) which is where Karter will swallow some dye stuff, and we will see if it goes up for reflux and how long it takes to go through his system, if it's delayed, too fast, etc. They also want me to bring a dirty diaper for testing for malabsorption issues, etc.

Until then and until results, I continue to play with his diet. I find a high protein diet with low carbs, no/very low dairy, with fruits and vegetables that he likes and won't have ill affects (citrus, etc.) seem to do the best with him and he's happiest those days and sometimes sleeps better. His sleep is such that he prefers to really eat around 8:30, which is usually after he's gone to bed, then eat/nurse a few times in the late night, and then sleep soundly from like 3-9am. I suppose it's probably reflux related as by the early to late morning all acid would be gone from his system and allowing him to sleep. Not fun at all.

Okay I said this was going to be quick....besides Karter who has now added a few words to his vocab-uh oh, cookie, tree, Kee (Kian) and another I don't remember...and has gotten his 2 top molars and working on the bottom (backwards from Kiain and most other kids I think they usually get bottom first)... we put up 2 trees. The nice artificial one my grandparents left--that's our "pretty" one with ribbon and just silver balls and crystal ornaments. Then Sunday we picked the coldest, windiest day of the entire year to get a tree on the windiest, coldest hill on Canandaigua lake with Patrick and Savannah. Karter was fine in my Ergo carrier on my back in a snowsuit. Kian was fine at first but cheeks got pretty frozen and he got pretty tired from running in all that snow. Finn came along and he and Zoey and Duke ran around like maniacs in and out of the trees. He slept the rest of the day I think, tired dog. He loves the snow! Loves running, rolling, eating, jumping, digging in it, it's fun to watch.

The boys are loving the Christmas decorations-especially the "activity sets" as Kian calls the Nativities. We have 3 or 4 and they play with them all the time. Kian collected all the baby Jesus' and then put them in little present boxes under the tree. I think that's a fitting thing for the real reason for the holiday actually...

My shopping is almost done. We can't do a lot this year, as I would like to, but with 2 houses still on our plates, blah! I did mostly online shopping using www.ebates.com (I get cash back for everything I buy through that site! It's sweet!) and all the free shipping, coupon codes, etc. it was just so worth it to not drag 2 little, sticky-fingered, getting all crabby and tied and hungry boys, who will see their presents, or see things they want, or hate getting in and out of the car a billion times. Directly to my door with one click and it's done. I think I only had to go to Target for one thing and BJ's for another. Score. Kian still found my hiding spot and saw some of his. I wonder how long he'll buy the "it's for your cousin" story? Especially since he only has 2 so far! ha!

Well...that's my "quick" update, after a very long, busy day all over 2 counties...I'm off to bed!

World Breastfeeding week thoughts

If you were told there was one thing you could do to give your newly born baby immunities for up to 2 years of his life (or more) the fight future obesity, to help prevent him from getting diabetes, to prevent you from getting breast cancer, to keep his ear infections to none or very few in the first year of his life, that bottle-rot and rotten teeth would not occur, to give him the perfect nutrition, to keep him from getting diarrhea and rashes, to boost his IQ, and on the list goes...wouldn't people be lining up for this "wonder drug" or to get this "amazing vaccine"?

They would. They should. But, they aren't.

It's breastfeeding. The most natural, normal thing since the beginning of time. Yet, some "try" it, and even fewer stick with it. Yes, there are many reasons for that. But, I have to say this: As a parent, it's our job to sacrifice for our kids. You run out to get the driest diaper for their bums, the best clothes, all the vaccines so they stay healthy, search out the best day cares and schools and nannies...but the one thing that surpasses all that, parents (not just moms) toss aside as an inconvenience and figure formula is "just as good". It's not.

Now, I don't want to get into more controversy, because I know there really are women out there that have tried and not succeeded at nursing (I won't say failed, but they didn't fail their kids). And then there's the excuses. If you don't want to just say that. But, I laugh, cringe, sigh, and am even angry sometimes when I hear things from doctors, nurses and other medical "professionals" about formula being just as good and giving new moms reasons to not nurse. This is especially annoying when watching those baby stories, birth shows, etc. on tv.

"My milk didn't come in." Or some variation of, (wasn't coming in, took too long, etc.).

"I wasn't making enough."

"He was needing more than I could produce."

"I'm too small/big/something."

"He really only needs it the first few days." Or variation of time-week, month, 6 months, etc.

"He doesn't want to." (this is different from he isn't able to, which does truly happen.)

"He's getting too big/old for it."

"He needed formula to get rid of jaundice." (sigh, grr)

"I had to go back to work."

"I didn't get anything while pumping."

Etc.

Again, there are true supply problems and true latching problems and other medical conditions that can prevent mom and baby from a happy nursing relationship. However, the reasons I just listed, are usually forms of excuses or outs for them. Number one rule while nursing: if it is happy for you AND baby, then continue. If mom isn't happy with it, then baby will feel that and it will become a struggle, possibly painful, and unhappy time for both.

And, really it's not the moms' fault. Especially, new moms. They're taken advantage of by doctors who wants fast, speed, results, charts, graphs, etc. They want to take control of the delivery by drugs and surgeries on their time, not what's best for mom and baby. They want to see measures of intake by baby and the output and ounces and cc's and ml and so on. They dislike that breast milk straight from the breast isn't measurable. (Okay, not all doctors are that way, but a lot are that I've seen.)

New moms are told that the baby MUST have formula to keep his temperature up, his weight up, his blood sugar, get rid of jaundice, etc. WRONG, wrong wrong. None of that is true. They told me that they would need to give Karter some formula in a dropper because his blood sugar was low. He wasn't even an hour old and hadn't even nursed yet. I didn't want it, but they said it was "hospital policy". Malarkey. (heard that lately?) Thanks to my big mouth mom they didn't and I nursed him and astonishingly his blood sugar immediately when to where it should be. Hmmm, who knew that breast milk and colostrum was so magical? It actually did what it was supposed to do! How about that?! And when his jaundice was still going strong at 8 weeks, I told them before they even suggested that I wasn't doing formula to "get rid of it". And it went away just fine.

There are real physical breast issues that some moms face, but in general, you're never too small, too big, too anything for baby. Sure when he first comes out his head might be half the size of the breast he's eating from, but that won't last long.

It kills me when, on tv, the moms say "I tried breastfeeding but my milk wasn't coming in, so now he gets formula." Did NO ONE educate these moms that milk doesn't come in for at least 3 days? That colostrum is all a baby needs the first few days? These nurses and doctors who are caring for mom and baby in the hospital for 2-3 days forgot to or failed to mention that? Sigh. It's supply and demand-if he needs it, it will be there. Very rarely do moms not make enough. Growth spurt? Baby nurses mores, tells mom's body to make more, baby satisfied.

Pumping is a whole different issue. Some are able to pump and get a lot, some pump and pump and get barely a drop. That is vastly different from what the baby takes in by mouth from the breast. Babies are way more efficient than any man-made, plastic pump. So, for those who have to go back to work (which I have done a few times) pumping is an option, but most hate the thought of it (hence the sacrifices, I was speaking of...). But, there are those who pump and get nothing, yet nursing baby is happy, so they do supplement during the day, etc.

This post isn't to bash moms who can't successfully breastfeed (or get baby breast milk one way or another). It isn't to criticize moms who choose not to. If that's what they choose, it's what they choose, and any guilt-inducing, bashing, or forcing just makes matters worse. It's to point out that as parents we make decisions for our children and the very first, and best one is either misguided, not explained, not discussed, not supported, misunderstood by new moms and their doctors, nurses, pediatricians. My experience was that I had already set my mind to breastfeeding at all costs and I read books and sites online about it as I prepared for it. But, sadly, I think it was just in passing that my OB asked what I was going to do, breast or bottle? The pediatrician may have asked at the initial pre-baby consult, but I don't remember. When I said 'breast', most medical professionals I dealt with just nodded and said "good." No one asked if I was taking a prep class, or had a book on it, or had the number of a lactation consultant, or anything. I think there was a pamphlet in the folder from the OB about it, but that was about it.

For every mom on the fence, or not realizing the greatness of breast milk, an experience (or non experience) like mine, would be easily influenced to choose formula. I know that in your head you're saying "wars, economy, statistics, numbers, unemployment, starving people in the streets losing their homes, and you're worried about education on breastfeeding?" Yes. I worry about other things too. But, I've seen what it can do. I've seen my boys barely get sick. I've seen my milk allergic baby thrive on it. I've seen and felt the bond with them. I've suffered pumping and not sharing feeding duties-especially at night. And there are days I groan "you want to eat again?" or just don't want to do it.

Statistics prove breastfed babies are healthier overall, now and in the future. Just as important as getting him in the "right" preschool, is beginning his nutrition and his life the best way. Something to think about. Something doctors and nurses and big companies who thrive on new moms' naivety and money should think about. But then again, they wouldn't be making the big bucks if no infants had multiple ear infections and tubes, or sucked down Similac by the gallon, would they?