Work

As much as I had hoped to avoid this time, it's come. I will be starting back to work on April 7th, if not sooner. Ugh. The thought of working, getting up, getting ready, getting Kian ready, taking him to daycare, and not being with him all day, rushing to get him, feed him, having, maybe, half the amount of time with him, or less, I hate it. Then I feel guilty because I did miss work, some of the time. I missed the girls and the clients. Not necessarily the work.

I mentioned to the girls if they still needed another person to let me know. Well they jumped all over me, told my former boss and she called me, in a matter of 10 minutes. So I went in and we talked, like basically "what can we do to make this work, so you will come back" kind of thing. And since I technically only resigned in September, I don't have to do all that new employee "stuff". That's nice, real nice.

I let them know my biggest concern was the transition for me and for Kian. He's never been away from me for more than 2-3 hours, here at his home, with someone he's known well (ie Elissa and sometimes Paul). I let her know I wanted to start back with half days at least the first week to get him acclimated to daycare and me into the routine, *enter sob here* with the knowing that there needs to be some flexibility in my schedule if I need to come and go earlier/later, etc.

So, my guilt-laden self, along with Kevin, are venturing into the daycare realm. I've worked at daycares so I know the ins and outs and what to look for in good or bad settings. At this time I think I prefer a center because there are so many eyes, so many regulations, and other kids for him to interact with, at his age level. Although home daycares can be more individual, I guess I am paranoid about what could go on that no one would ever know. Even though I provided nannying at a home before. Makes sense right? ha. My first inclination is to go with the daycare I used to work at because I know some of the people, know the routines, am familiar with things there. But, we have another tour set up for tomorrow and we'll see how that goes. Ugh. I hate this.

This will be interesting. I hate doing it, but right now we need more income, if we can get rid of a school loan or two that would be ideal and I could probably stay home again and/or have another one. ha. So... we shall see how it goes. I have no qualms about making more changes if it doesn't work out. Somehow I think Kian will adjust better than I will, I hope.