Night-time nuisance

I took Kian to his 18 month check up on December 23rd. They said he was smart, verbal, happy and healthy. He's 25 1/2 pounds and 34 inches. No problems whatsoever. The pediatrician went on about how soon we'll need to start time out and that Kian will probably start testing us and having some behavior issues. I was like "yeah yeah whatever" in my head because A. I work in child development and I know this stuff and B. my child is so happy and agreeable and, well, easy.

Thank you doctor. You jinxed my child. I swear it was like the next day Kian started in on things. Now, I know that there were lots of holiday outings and his routine was totally off and he was tired a lot, etc. But, he wasn't crabby or cranky. No, his problem right now is he is slapping everything. It's not done to be malicious. Usually it involves the cats, they take the brunt of it. I don't think he understands he's hitting them and it's hard and hurts. He sometimes is playing with Kevin and walks up and slaps him, in the face, arm, wherever. He's smiling and happy when he does it. He never hits, kicks or bites us when he's angry or upset-he just throws himself on the floor and cries. To that I can walk away and ignore. But, I'm in a catch-22 with the slapping. I don't want to react to in in ways that make him want to do it more, for my reaction to him, a vicious cycle. He's a little young for time out yet. I've tried putting him in a chair for 30 seconds to start so he gets the idea, but it's not happening yet. Sometimes ignoring it works, sometimes it doesn't. I've been telling him "no hit, that hurts" then we say sorry to daddy or the kitty and give them a hug. I know it's going to be ongoing.

Another issue that is bigger on my list right now is bedtime. I do bedtime 98% of the time. Mostly because when Kian was an infant I'd just nurse him, read him a story and put him to bed. I have a routine, which I have gone through with Kevin and he follows. The problem is that Kian only wants me to do the bedtime routine. Lately, he cries and screams and flips out if I don't come up there and sit with him for a few minutes. Sometimes I can get away with kissing him downstairs after reading him a few books and Kevin will take him up for teeth brushing and then into bed.

I don't know how to get him to not flip out when Kevin puts him to bed. We've done the routine together several times. But, he still cries if Kevin sits in the chair and reads the books while I sit nearby. And I still have to hold him for a few minutes before he goes in the crib. I think it's a phase right now, as he also begs for Kevin all day but the second Kevin walks in the door he says 'no' and hides from him. Ugh! Sometimes I'm just so tired I would love him to go to bed with Kevin peacefully. My other thought is to have Kevin and Kian go out alone, together. Kevin picks Kian up sometimes from daycare and is home with him for a few hours before I get home and everything is fine. But, I'm thinking I should have them go out, whether to the store, for a special treat, playground, something so that he thinks being with Kevin is a huge, fun deal. We'll see...

Any thoughts? Who does the bedtime routine in your house? And how to stop the slapping??

1 comment:

bubble said...

i told you that child was possessed. leave the kid with the bum. on the parenting breakdown, its 98% you, 1% cats, 1% stinko. and thats my expert opinion