Things I never thought I'd say

"Hold it with 2 fingers. Point it down at the toilet. Shake it off."

"Don't put your fingers in your bum to check, I know it's clean, I just wiped you!"

"Please don't kiss Karter when I'm changing his diaper... Because he could pee on your head."

"Saying 'koopid' and 'stookin' is just the same as saying stupid, so stop it now."

"No you may not pee in the parking lot, thanks for asking."

"I can't uncut the sandwich. You said you wanted it cut, so I cut it. Now just eat it!"

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