A memo

To: Neighbors, Apartment tenants and trailer park residents next door
From: The Glors, and Finn
RE: Our dog
Date: March 29, 2011

It has come to my attention almost a 100 times now, that my dog continually runs into your yard. Mostly, because I call him and he does not come; or he comes running from your yards when I shock him. Please note that said dog would NOT keep returning to your yard if you refrained from: petting him, calling him, playing with him and feeding him. But, if by all means you want to continue this shared pet keeping, then please begin by allowing him to poop in your yards and pee on your bushes and fences. Also, he likes Taste of Wild dog food, which is a fairly expensive brand.
Thank you.

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