Yep. One of those posts. I don't do it often enough. I have done a lot of thinking and more thinking and listening lately. I know that not everyone knows all the details, but this year has been an extremely stressful year for me, and my family. There is so much going on, so much has gone on, some has been resolved, some is still being resolved, some things turned out great, and some are unknown (isn't everything, really?). Some things had to do with Karter before he was born and concerns and worries arose, but he's perfectly fine! My family has issues they are working through (Kevin and I are fine, not that).
Because of all the stresses this year I really have been praying a lot. And meaning it. I prayed hard for Karter to not have the issues and problems they were saying he might have. Then I prayed thankfully that he is a very healthy boy. I prayed and still am praying for my family and for things to continue to change for the better. Does prayer work? Yes! Well, maybe not in the way we want it to, but it does. My baby boy is perfectly healthy and doesn't have syndromes and abnormalities they warned us he could have. I believe that's because of all the prayers that went up for him. Is my family perfect and going to be oh so happy tomorrow? Nope. But, I'm seeing changes and things I've prayed for come to fruition. Of course, it's not always that easy and happy, somethings God doesn't want to answer the way we want too. I'm not very good at explaining these things well, so take a look here at MckMama's post on prayer. It's about her son, but she does a great job explaining prayer.
And, maybe, after all this, like some believe, it's nothing. There's no God and what is the worst that happens? I've lived my life believing in something higher than me. Something that I can turn too when people have failed me. There's a saying something about "would rather live like there's a heaven and find out there's not, than live like there isn't and find out there is," and hell too. Read this article for more. Maybe as some say, I'm doing it all for naught. But, even if that is the case (which I do not believe it is, and very much believe in God) than I've lost nothing, and gained much in my life by being able to let things go, to release my stress onto him and feel that my prayers are heard and answered and feel protected by the highest power.
I am raising my children to believe in God, in the power of prayer and heaven and hell. I won't misuse it to get them to do what I want or obey. Yes, there has been misuse and abuse of religion and God. (And I truly believe there is a difference in God and religion-that's a post for another day!) Some use it to make others fearful, and to dominate, and that's not what God is, who God is. I don't really know where I wanted to go, or am going with this post. But, it's Sunday. I'm going to church. I'm just thinking about my answered prayers, and my ability to cast all my cares on him. And I guess I just wanted to say some of that... this seems very unorganized and unfinished, but it will either end up being 12 pages long or I stop now until I sort out the words in my head...so we'll save more for later...